Here's a little something from ten years ago. Originally titled "Wowza Numbers", it has been specially adapted for the cookie mail. [Note: I have reverted the title and contents to the original.]
********************************************************************* excerpt from WORTHLESS MATHEMATICS, Volume 1, Number 1 (Summer 1986) ********************************************************************* -------------------------------------------------- WOWZA NUMBERS John Leo Hewlett-Packard Laboratories, Palo Alto, CA and MIT, Cambridge, MA -------------------------------------------------- 1. INTRODUCTION Numbers have become too boring. In order to add a little spice to your everyday number, you can put some meaningless word in front of it. This paper is an attempt to capitalize on that idea. 2. DEFINITION WOWZA NUMBER: A number with the word "wowza" in front of it. For example, 2 becomes wowza2. Complex numbers can also become wowza numbers. For example, 3.62+4i becomes wowza3.62+4i. 3. THEOREMS THEOREM 1: Wowza numbers are equivalent to ordinary numbers. PROOF: To make a wowza number from an ordinary number, prepend the word "wowza" to the number. To convert a wowza number to an ordinary number, remove the word "wowza." Thus there is a 1-1 mapping from numbers to wowza numbers, proving their equivalence. [] THEOREM 2: Wowza numbers are one of the greatest advances of mathematics. PROOF: Numbers are clearly one of the greatest advances of mathematics. By theorem 1, wowza numbers are equivalent to numbers. Therefore, wowza numbers are one of the greatest advances of mathematics. [] *********************************************************************